Peregrine Guide Blog

During an episode of Cheers, Cliff Clavin, the bar know-it-all played by John Ratzenberger, kicked into one of his slightly off-tangent diatribes about the Buffalo Theory:

“A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. When the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back who are killed off first.  This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest braincells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we all know, kills brain cells. Naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest braincells first.  In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That’s why you always feel smarter after a few beers.”

In 1896, Hungary celebrated its millenial celebrations, commemorating the arrival of the seven tribes of the Magyar to the Carpathian Basin in 896. Loosely modeled after a Transylvanian fortress of the same name, Vajdahunyad Castle (Vajdahunyad vára) was built for the celebrations.

The building is not really a castle at all: it’s a large-scale model whose structure comprises three distinct wings, one Gothic, one Romanesque and one Baroque, making it quite a bizarre sight when seen from a distance. Sneak up closer and its magic will be revealed: a moat, and the charming grounds hemmed by trees and footpaths. The attention to detail has been painstaking, so it’s like seeing three extraordinarily pretty castles rolled into one.

Opposite the entrance to Vajdahunyad Castle is one of Budapest’s most famous monuments - the Statue of Anonymous by Miklós Ligeti. The mysterious, hooded figure is that of a scribe to King Béla, thought to be responsible for chronicling the history of the early Magyars. As there were several monarchs named Béla in the 12th and 13th centuries, it is difficult to determine exactly who he was and when he lived.

Hungarian writers still trek to the Statue of Anonymous to touch his quill, which is purported to give the writer a healthy dose of needed medecine, namely: inspiration.

Socialism: You have two cows. Give one to your neighbor.

Communism: You have two cows. Give both cows to the government and they may give you some of the milk.

Fascism: You have two cows. Give all of the milk to the government, and the government sells it.

Nazism: You have two cows. The government shoots you and takes both cows.

Anarchism: You have two cows. Keep both of your cows, shoot the government agent and steal another cow.

Capitalism: You have two cows. Sell one cow and buy a bull!